Thursday, May 8, 2008

It's a Nader!

If there is one thing you can count on living in the south, it's Tornado season (aka Nader season). I have vivid memories of being waken from a deep slumber by my panicked Mom shouting at me to "GET UP" because we had to "GET TO THE STORM SHELTER". I hated the weather, especially on a tornado warning school night.

This morning when I got up it was like any other. The temperature outside was muggy but I didn't think too much about it. After the kids were off to school I got into the shower and hurried to the doctor. As I arrived I was told the weather was "taking a bad turn" which in Redneckville means "prepare to batton down the hatches, nader weather is fast approachin'". So I decided after my appointment to pick Logan up at Vincent's pick up time as well.

As I was driving the news came over the radio. All schools, both county (the boys) and city (Arwen's) were dismissing early. This meant I got to call and ask my Mom (please read plead and beg) to pick her up for me. After I had the boys I met up with Mom who was so kind to pick up lunch at Zaxby's (I owe you Mom, big time) so the ride home was rather peaceful.

I wish I could say the rest of my afternoon has been equally tranquil but I'd be lying through my teeth. My children, being forced into the cramped quarters that is the playroom, have been at one another since. I've been considering barricading myself into the office until Jimbo arrives home to make it through the day with a touch of sanity and control left.

And while I hate the weather it's made so much worse by one local weather man. The bastard. Why do you get such a perverse pleasure from scaring the absolute shit out of folks guy? Each time we go into a watch/warning you begin to salivate and a light glows from the television out of your beady eyes. It's not very nice to all but scream at your viewing audience...


Seriously dude, is this the reason they stopped doing that little "giveaway" each time you were 3 degrees off of a daily high or low temperature? If you determine the giveaway weather anything like you do potential tornado's they must fork out some serious coffee mugs. Do the world a favor, either take some Zanax or learn to tone it down. Someone can't die of a tornado if they're already dead from a nasty tumble down the stairs because you've sent them into a frenzy.

Welp, gotta go, it's "almost here" again. If you don't hear from me, a nader' got us.


Anonymous said...

I'm not sure whether to be concerned or laugh. :) Keep safe from the nadar... and try not to kill the foolish weather man. LOL

Katherine said...

That's why I won't live in the midwest. One of my earliest memories is being drug into the basement because of a tornado. It got the goat shed, but left the house. (this was in Michigan)

Give me earthquakes any day. You never know when they're going to happen, so you don't spend time worrying about it!

Erin said...

I remember those times all too well myself...except for me as a kid it was either the bathtub we had to hide in or a tiny little linen closet that my mom and I and a radio could barely fit in. Actually I'm not sure how we ever did fit in it? And LORDY I think I'd have to give that news station a piece of my mind on their crazy weatherman...Lord he sounds nuts!