Living in a Glass House

Sometimes I feel bad about being a worry wart parent. It effects the way my children are being raised and the way they are experiencing the world.

My children rarely go outside. It's too difficult with just myself to watch them in the front as you can't fence it in our neighborhood. So each time we wander outside it's to the back deck or the back yard and that time is always limited. One child will get tired before the other or one will want to do something else. And so I wrangle them all back inside with me and there we stay, one child always left looking out the window, wishing to play in the grass.

I remember when I was a kid. I could go outside, even at a very young age, into our fenced yard and play to my hearts content. I have vivid memories of catching butterflies and climbing trees. All while my Mother stayed inside. She would check up on me from time to time of course but not too often. Back then things were different. Back then a child could be a child, a Mom could turn her back for more than 1 minute at a time.

It's sad when you think about it. I fear for the future of my grandchildren. Maybe I should stop being so overprotective, maybe then they can experience life as god intended. But I know I won't be able to, not now at least. The world just isn't safe enough anymore and children are all too often the ones to suffer because of it.

Gone Baby Gone Aftermath

Talk about a movie you just can't shake. There was so much I wanted to say about this movie but don't want to ruin it for those who haven't experienced it just yet. So I won't speak of the movie, only of the aspect that forms the basis of the story.

A girl goes missing. Who has her? Is she safe? Is she even alive? Is she being molested? You just don't know and probably never will. This is the reason I fear each and everyday for my own children. I worry about them so very much and my heart skips a beat each morning as I kiss them and tell them I will see them after school.

The truth is, none of our children are safe. There are people in this world that feel no remorse, only a perverse need they must release and a child is their vessel. The things that some children experience in their final moments of life at the hands of a pedophile...there just are no words to describe how upset this makes me, how wrong this is. I remember being 6 years old and hearing about Adam Walsh. That was my introduction to the vile people that inhabit this world and I've never forgotten, never. I vividly recall hearing about his headless body being found. I listened to my Mother fight back tears as she clutched me tightly to her chest and I can still feel her arms around me, even now.

And because of this, I live each day in fear. I hawk eye my children. I don't allow them to sleepover at friends houses nor do I allow them to stay at home without a family member babysitter (aka my Mom, Sister or Mother in Law). I refuse to take that risk, I couldn't enjoy my time out anyway if I worried about my children.

We need more stern laws in place for child abuse, all forms of it. Children are the most precious commodity we have, we should make every effort to protect it.

I'm sorry for the weird and emotional post. This movie just really touched me and even hours later I cannot shake from my mind. For some reason I keep thinking that losing a child is bad enough but losing a child to a violent crime...the guilt, the anger, the desperation...I can't even imagine.