Arwen has always been artistic. Coloring, drawing, painting, molding with play-doh. She enjoys coming up with new pictures and we run out of supplies steadily here.
First I'd like to show you a picture of Zelda the Twilight Princess art from the game guide, note the little creature riding the wolf and of course Zelda astride his faithful horse Epona.
This is a picture she drew when she was 4 years old. Yes you read that right. At the age of 4 Arwen asked to play Jimbo's gamecube system. She'd watched him play Zelda Twilight Princess and fell in love with it. He hooked it up in her bedroom and off she went. For the next year she drew pictures of her adventures and when she finally beat it I was proud of her but amazed. How many 4-5 year olds (she hit 5 during this time) beat a role-playing game like Zelda?
And this is something she just did for me today. I'd noticed her cutting up random bits of leftover construction paper and when I asked what her newest project was she said it was a surprise for me. 
Maybe I'm just one proud Momma but I'm awestruck by this. She's only 6 years old and the art she does is so amazing, especially for her age.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Future Artist?
Friday, May 30, 2008
I think I love You
When I approached your counter I was hesitant. You were obviously very busy and to pass the time I walked over to the pigment samples. The new glitter one just begged to be looked at and I gently opened the lid. To my horror flakes of the glitter flew all over and a pretty representative (doing a make-over) looked at me strangely so I explained I wanted to see it's coverage on skin. She was nice enough but I put the glitter down. What can I say, if you ever need to distract me just place a shiny object in my line of sight.
I was about to walk away when the same representative looked up briefly to ask if she could help me. I told her I was looking for the Shadestick in Sharkskin, she directed me to the side where they had the testers/make-over ones. I saw two sharkskins and waited for maybe 10 minutes before she looked up again to see if I was ready.
I was sad when I requested and she said they had sold out. I told her I'd tried to get one online but they were gone there as well. I thanked her and she walked to remove the two tester tubes from the display. I saw her walk to the register and grab a small bag. What a shame to throw away such great product I thought.
She then turned and walked toward me and handed me the bag.
"Don't you go telling everybody now." She smiled.
"Oh my god, I think I love you." I said back. "Thank you so much!!!"
I walked out with two barely used sharkskin shadesticks. So that bad day at the MAC counter? Forget I ever said it!
Bottomless Pits
All day long I hear it. Sure it changes from time to time but the basic structure of the request remains solid.
"I want *insert food here* Mommy!"
I hear this minutes after breakfast, all through out the morning, and into the afternoon. I hear it after they've just finished one thing and have decided they still want more. In fact, this week alone they have eaten (just as snacks now):
3 bags of chips (Cheeto's, Doritos, and Chex mix)
14 cups of yogurt
2 boxes of little debbie cakes
1 carton of ice cream
2 boxes of cereal
3 cans of Mandrian Oranges
8 Bananas
2 gallons of milk
I've never been one to deny anyone food, especially children. But this is becoming crazy. A part of me thinks that since they do eat it (usually) that it's not wasteful and obviously they are hungry but another part of me knows this type of weekly gorging will eat our budget like nothing else. This doesn't even include things they want for drink all day.
Yesterday I did a structured time for snacks. I gave one 2 hours after breakfast and another after lunch (after they woke from naptime). This was hard however because Logan and Vincent cried, screamed and begged for more snacks. The only upside being they actually ate the dinner I cooked, especially Logan who turns his nose up at everything but yogurt, chips and oranges.
Maybe I'll keep trying to do the structured thing. I have planned to bake at least x2 per week this summer with the kids (it's a good structured learning activity and they enjoy it) so that should save a bit of money as far as snacks are concerned. I just hope after a few days the boys quit running to me constantly asking over and over again for different foods. I feel like snack machine.
Summer scoreboard for the day, I think I'm on top. I'm meeting Jimbo this afternoon to take the kids to Pizza Hut to use their reading completion coupons. So unless something goes incredibly wrong between now and then, I'm awarding today's point to me.
Kids=2
Mom=2
Thursday, May 29, 2008
When did I become the expert??
This morning as I was running my ass off chasing children (too bad it doesn't appear enough to keep the junk in my trunk at bay) the phone rang. I weaved through my children to answer it.
"Hellloo?"
"Jaime? Oh my god, Justice just fell out of the bed what do I do??" I recognize my sisters voice.
"Where is she?"
"She's right here," she answers. "I'm holding her."
"She's not crying??"
"No, she did when it happened."
"When did it happen?"
"Maybe 30 minutes ago. I was sleeping with her on the bed and she rolled out of it. She fell between the dresser and the bed. She's got a tiny bump about the size of a dime on the side of her head. Do you think she's ok? Should I call the doctor? Can I drive up there and let you take a look at her?"
"You didn't call the doctor??"
"No...her pupils are fine..."
"Why?" I'm beyond myself. "If she fell and you are worried why not call the doctor??"
"Can't they take her away from me?" I hear the fear in her voice and remind myself she's not new to this but her oldest child is now 8 and it's been awhile for her.
"Listen to me. They won't take her from you. It was an accident. You fell asleep and this kind of thing happens all the time. But if you think she could be hurt, NEVER...EVER...wait to call the doctor. In fact, call him now. I'm sure she is fine, if it happened 30 minutes ago but you can never be to sure."
"Ok, I'll call him now," she promises.
"Call me and let me know what's going on when you can please. Ok?"
"Ok."
We hang up.
10:30pm The phone rings.
"Hello?"
In the background I hear Justice screaming like crazy.
"Jaime? Justice just threw up and she won't stop crying. Do you think it's from hitting her head earlier?"
"Did you call the doctor?"
"Yes I did, the nurse said to keep an eye on her. But should we take her to the hospital?" The baby is still squalling.
"Call the doctor again."
"I just did," I hear the baby settling down. "She threw up on me, I don't know what is wrong. I know she doesn't feel that great because she has that ear infection. We made sure to go and get a bed guard so she won't fall out again and she was fine but now she's crying."
"She has an ear infection?" My sister is a pack a day smoker, her fiance smokes 2 packs per day.
"Yeah, they gave her an antibiotic and she was on it a week and it didn't clear it up so they put her on a new one."
"Please tell me you and Craig are not smoking around her. If you are smoking you have to change your clothing, smoke causes ear infections in babies."
"We do not smoke around her." Her voice is harsh and I can tell I've pissed her off. They probably already got this from the pediatrician.
"Ok, well...maybe the new antibiotic is upsetting her tummy..."
"But we gave that to her early this morning!"
This conversation goes on for several minutes before I convince her that she needs to call her doctor. We hang up the phone and as I type this she never did call me back.
This is one of the more frustrating things about my relationship with my sister. I love my nieces and I worry about them. I used to make myself sick with worry over Zoe when I had to stop babysitting her. But I learned to distance myself because there was nothing I could do and all the worrying in the world wouldn't change anything.
I know bad things happen to the best of people. I also know that Justice falling off the bed was an accident. But hearing that baby scream from her throbbing ears full of infection and knowing they've been told (by me repeatedly) that cigarette smoke causes it...it pisses me off.
On a positive note, after today I'm finally on the summer scoreboard!
Summer Scoreboard:
Kids=2
Mom=1
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Summer Scoreboard
I've been kicked, tripped and pee'd on. I've been run ragged and put through the ringer.
But I'm not throwing in the towel just yet.
Summer Scoreboard:
Kids = 2
Mom = O
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Smooth move X-Lax
Today I decided to attempt a venture out to Hell-Mart, all kids in tow. This is the first time I've ever braved the market alone with all of them. I'd also decided that if they behaved we'd visit the toy section for something small as a reward.
The trip to the store was uneventful, as we parked and piled out the children listened beautifully, forming a line and holding hands. I was so proud. We went inside, got a cart and off we went. After I made my selections we went to the toy department. We ended up spending more time there than intended but they still did me proud and as we left I decided since it was late to splurge on McD's Happy Meals and ice cream cones.
First I should say, I was stupid to consider this without going inside the store. I pulled up, placed our order and put the Happy Meals to the side. I passed the small cones to each child and pulled out into traffic. Maybe it was my intense pride that karma needed to bitch slap down to earth but I was about to start a headlong dive into hell.
I'm driving along...
"NO ICE CREAM CONE!" Vincent thrusts his arm holding his barely touched cone out.
"Aw come on Vince..."
"NO ICE CREAM CONE!" I realize immediately this will go one of two ways and sure enough he reaches to place it into the cup holder.
"Wait! Give to Mommy!" I reach back and grab it. I start looking as I drive for a trash can.
"Here Mommy." It's Logan this time. He's pushing is cone at me as well.
"Not you too! Eat your cone please."
"No." He keeps holding his arm out. I maneuver the cone I'm currently holding over to my left hand and grab it.
At this point I am trying to drive while also licking the cones alternately to avoid ice cream all over myself and the car. It's a losing battle. I can't keep up. Then by the grace of god I see a trash can! I hit my turn signal and start to turn when I hear it. A strange yet familiar watery sound...oh shit, the drinks!
I get to the trash can and throw away the cones. I then spend the next few minutes cleaning up the cokes I just spilled with napkins. At this point I'm cursing myself for ever leaving the comfort and security of my house. I get back into the driver's seat and begin hurrying home...when my irritable bowel attacks...from the ice cream I just gulped down.
As I'm driving I'm praying I don't have an accident. I feel like I'm about to die. I pull into the driveway and begin herding the children into the house. I leave everything else in the van to take care of business because some shit (excuse the pun) just won't wait.
When I'm done I go back outside and empty the van. I get the kids situated and comfortable when Annabel begins to cry. She's hungry. I grab her and get her fed before sitting down at the desk
Off to a rocky start, summer scoreboard:
Kids=1
Mom=O
It's Begun
This is why we can't keep new recliners. I found them doing this while making their snack...
Note the ripped corner...
Thank god for this baby girl or they'd be in sooooo much trouble. 
Celebrities and Charity
As I was browsing I'm not Obsessed I came across a story about Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and their possible purchase of this huge 60 million dollar castle in France. Below the story were comments of course and as always, there were anonymous people coming out in droves to name call and bash.
One comment in particular really bothered me. The person (again, anon of course) called Jolie and Pitt hypocrites and stated they hoped they moved permanently from the USA to France because they are fake hypocrites who smile for the camera but fight behind closed doors. Well you know me...I had to respond. I told this person jealousy was very unbecoming and why can't people just be happy for each other.
This trickled to me being told to "shush up" and then informed Jolie and Pitt are hypocrites of the worst kind because they give money and preach to others to donate money and live frugally yet here they are, living in mansions.
Here is my thing. How much do you expect celebrities to give and sacrifice before you consider their sacrifices to be just that? This brings to mind a problem I had with Oprah. It drove me batty hearing her tell people to donate to this and that but to watch as she lived it up and sat on billions. However, I got over it when I realized this is her money. She earned it. And while it would be great if she donated more ultimately that is her decision.
In the case of Jolie though, I just don't see it as the same. She donates exactly 1/3 of her income to charity. That's more than other celebrities and on top of that she donates her time, flying around the world as a Good Will Ambassador.
What do you think?
Monday, May 26, 2008
Living Lohan
Tonight I tuned in to Denise Richard's new E! show, "It's Complicated". It was decent enough and I'll probably tune in next week.
Directly following it was the series, "Living Lohan" that follows Lindsay Lohan's Mom Dina and sister Ali. I decided to give it a shot and found myself more than once looking at Jimbo and saying, "what the fuck?"
From my understanding the premise of the series is supposed to revolve around 14 year old Ali and her dreams of becoming...famous...for a lack of a better word. But instead I was treated to Dina reading as much tabloid fodder as she could get her claws on and then contacting the publishers demanding it be removed or "you'll hear from my attorney".
For someone who claims she wants to protect her children, what the hell is she thinking allowing her 14 year old daughter to enter the spotlight. She already has watched her oldest enter into rehab, her every move captured on camera. Is that really what she wants for Ali? You can't complain one minute when Lindsay has bad press, "Ali and Cody (her youngest son) go to school, they have to deal with this", only to turn around the next minute and talk about your 14 year old being an artist and recording her own album.
That's the thing about being a parent. We are the ones versed in the world and because of it we have to tell our children no sometimes. Not because we want to hold them back but because it's for their own good. If they still want to do things when they are older then they can. But a good parent sets boundaries. A 14 year old is in no position to know exactly what is is they do and don't want and they certainly are not mature enough to make huge decisions in life.
This woman seriously needs to get her shit together.
Summer
Tomorrow is the first day of summer. I've got a plan of attack and it comprises of keeping the kids so busy they can't get into anything bad.
Lord help me, by the end of this summer I just know I'll be counting down until school again.
1 v/s 4 = It's ON
Ryan White News Clip
Does anyone else remember this amazing young man? I was younger than he was but I remember him well. When he passed away I felt a grief and sadness.
I hope he is never forgotten and that is why I'm sharing this on my blog with you all.
Aww but Naww
I hate you gravity. I know you serve a important purpose. Without you I'd go floating off into the ozone. But you also serve another indirect purpose because of it and that is where my animosity toward you comes in.
I'm referring to my "junk in the trunk".
When did I get so much junk, so much junk inside my trunk? I've become forced to either work out actively soon or watch as my junk extends to my thighs. I shiver, but not in anticipation, when I picture that one.
So gravity, thank you for keeping me firmly on the ground. But damn you for reminding me I'm not longer a 20-something.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Girls
Sometimes I really miss nights out with the 'girls'. I haven't had one in several years.
I remember when I was younger and my Mom would go out for the night with her girlfriends (or friend). She'd dress up all pretty and I can recall perfectly the smell of her perfume. She'd smile at me and my sister before heading out the door and we'd feel the excitement in the air.
Hopefully that will happen for me when the kids return to school and I get the opportunity to return to the adult world and create new friendships.
It's just one more thing to look forward to.
Am I asking too much?
Every single time my Mother gets any of my children it kills her to stay put at home with them. Instead she wants to put them in the car and drive around here and there. She claims this is because she needs something, wants to get something and then tells me I need to chill out.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
MAC
Ok, I see what the fuss is about. I finally got my hands on some MAC pigments and I'm in LOVE. They are so pigmented and gorgeous.
Last night I did a vibrant green look. It was funny because my eyes were shimmering in the movie theater lighting while we were waiting to see the new Indiana Jones. Jimbo kept staring at me (in a good way).
I snapped a few pictures. I'm not good at taking ones of my eyes though, so bear with me. I have one blurry and one sharp so you can see the shimmers.
*got my pigments HERE. A wonderful shop Emilee specializes in rare and hard to find pigments. It's a great way to test out MAC products before taking the plunge!
6 Questions
I borrowed this from Disappearing John RN.
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"
Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9."
Principal: "What is 6 x 6? "
Harry: "36."
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade."
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions." The principal and Harry both agreed.
Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!
Harry replied: "Pockets."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants."
Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, "Bubble gum."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"
Harry: "Shake hands."
The principal was trembling. Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"
Harry: "Firetruck."
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last six questions wrong....."
Nick and Hulk Hogan
This topic has the potential to be flame worthy. To preface it, I want to say this is just my opinion and everyone is entitled their own. With that said...
I'm sure many of you are aware of the car accident involving Nick Hogan and his friend John Graziano. Both young men had been drinking (Nick was 17 years old at the time, John 22). Nick was driving his Toyota Supra, John in the passenger seat, lost control and wrapped around a tree. Nick was wearing his seat belt which saved his life, John was not and is in a current vegetative state.
Nick was sentenced to 8 months in prison for his part in this and his father Hulk Hogan calls him often. Since we live in the day and age of the cyber paparazzi their phone calls have been shared with everyone via TMZ.com. One of the conversations has many people in an uproar. I won't say much about it because I think it's a situation where you have to hear it to make an opinion.
You can listen HERE. After come back for the rest of my entry.
Now, the talk of reality TV shows aside, I want to bring up something that bothers me greatly about this entire situation. Where is the responsibility from John? Yes it's terrible he was hurt so gravely, I feel for him and his family. But he was old enough to know better than to drive around with a drunk 17 year old and better still old enough to know to wear a safety belt.
In Redneckville we have serious accidents often. I'm sure it's not just here but I'd prefer only to speak for fact about what I know, like Redneckville. I guess it's a southern thing...country boys and their booze, but I've seen some horrible accidents in my time. I've seen more than one with a sheet draped over a body and the jaws of life on the scene. This is why I will preach at my children. I will drill it into their brains the importance of driving only when sober and to always wear a seat belt. Ultimately, it will be their choices that protect them, not someone else's. They are responsible for themselves.
I can understand the reason people find what Nick said to be so shallow. But on the other hand I think people really need to step back and realize John might be in a better place had he made better decisions. No one can predict the future, one can only brace for the possibilities. This is another reason I always buckle myself and my children in, I don't know who is driving drunk on the roads with me as I'm on the way home. It's not about my driving it's about the driving of others I could come across.
I'd like to hear what you all think about this.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Late Night Snack
"Mommy?" Logan speaks softly. I'm laying on his bed, cuddling him close to me as he's settling down for the night.
"Hmm?" I say back.
"Yogurt?" He stares at me with those baby blues.
"Awww Bud, it's nini time." I lean in to kiss him on the nose. I settle back and stroke his soft blond hair.
"Please." He smiles at me, my heart aches.
Needless to say, he got his yogurt.
Mom Confession of the Week
I eat ice cream out of the tub and so do my children. I like to think of it as community ice cream. My husband thinks it's disgusting. Oh well, more for us.
Inspring News Story
A policewoman in China was feeding up to 9 babies at one time after the killer earthquake either killed or wounded their own Mothers. She has a 6 month old baby of her own at home that she nurses so she didn't think twice about nursing these orphans. She's being praised as a hero.
Read the story HERE.
Food Fight!
My kitchen is covered in lemon cake and lemon icing. That was the flavor the boys chose to bake this morning. We baked cupcakes and a one layer before icing them. But at some point Logan nailed me in the face with a half eaten cupcake and that let lose a food fight of epic proportions.
And you know what? In between throwing icing around at each other and cake crumbs falling all over the floor, I had the best time. The mess was so totally worth it. I just wish I had my camera to take some pictures.
I love my little guys, they keep it fun around here. Now where is my mop?
So Far...
I've made...
2 bowls of cereal.
2 bowls of popcorn.
4 sets of carrots with ranch dip.
6 refills of Kool-Aid.
and it's only 10:00am. And that's only with Logan and Vincent home. Tomorrow Arwen begins her summer vacation.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Randomness and Pathology
First - benign! Thank the lord. The nodule was a mixture of muscle and fatty tissue but nothing bad.
Second - talked to someone else from the school. It appears that while they are not at capacity they did lose a classroom (budget cuts?) and therefore only have 1 room this year for 1st grade. This makes TONS more sense as to why Arwen wasn't invited this year. Why the Principal couldn't simply convey this to me I'll never understand.
Third - commenting on friends blogs. I've had issues before with blogger. First it was loading pictures up and now I'm having problems commenting. I'll post it up, hit publish and the computer will just sit there. It's beyond frustrating. So to everyone, I'm visiting and trying to comment. Hopefully it will resolve as the picture thing did.
Tomorrow is my first day holding the fort alone. I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm looking forward to it. I hate being bed bound, it drives me insane. It will also give me more time to catch up on everyone and to read up on the news I've missed.
Where it stands
I called my surgeon's office this morning and spoke to the sweetest receptionist you'll ever meet. She told me he usually doesn't see young patients but since he sees me perhaps he would make an exception. If not she assured me that they have a partner in the office for young children and that he can coordinate with my Ears, Nose and Throat doctor when having her tonsils removed if in fact she needs the biopsy. She's supposed to contact me tomorrow and let me know.
Today I'm feeling much better. The neck is sore but bearable. The only issue being Annabel who began vomiting at 6:25 this morning. She hadn't eaten since 11:50 or so the night before and threw up all that milk from then. She has since vomited once more but I'm hoping she's on the mend. Poor baby girl!
I wouldn't recommend anyone come to visit our house. It seems like there is a cloud of sickness and bad luck surrounding it recently. I'm going to have to do some major spring cleaning when I'm all better.
Late Night Worrying and Ranting
"Mommy, I have a lump in my neck too." Arwen walked up to me and motioned to her neck.
"Really?" I played along. "Where?"
"Feel, right...here." She pulled on my hand and placed it on the same side, same spot of my surgery.
I gently felt around and thought I was imagining things, so I felt again...and again...and my heart sank. She has a lump that is almost the same size in almost the same exact location of the one I just had removed.
I have to see the surgeon again in a week and I'll be making a dual appointment for her and myself. I thought I was worried before when this happened to me but I had no idea how worried I could be about something. It's 20 times worse when it's your child.
She's had issues with her tonsils and we'd planned on having them removed this summer. I'm thinking that if the surgeon feels a biopsy is necessary I can request they do both while she is under anesthesia.
It's 3:19 am and I've tossed and turned all night long. I wish it was for the reasons related to myself and not my little girl.
To make matters worse, I got a phone call this afternoon from the school I'd registered Arwen at. While not in our district I was assured that if the class was not at capacity she would be more than welcome (understandably they have to service the children in their zone first). I knew I'd be getting the call to tell me whether or not there was room in the class.
Let me start by saying the principal is an ass, I already knew this. He was a teacher for years at this same school and eventually got the job of principal. He's very well known by all the parents because he's very well despised (by his former students, now parents to his new batch).
He pissed Jimbo off not too long ago when he dropped Logan off at school one morning. He didn't have work that day and was wearing a t-shirt, blue jeans and driving his truck (which looks like something a crazy teen would drive - tinted windows, etc). He pulled up, got out and ran to the passenger side to take Logan inside. Mr. S saw this from the office and rushed outside.
Mr. S : You cannot park here.
Jimbo : I'm not, I'm just dropping him off.
Mr. S : Don't park here again.
Jimbo : I'm not parking, I'm dropping my son off...
Mr. S : Sir, this is a no parking zone, do not park here again or you will be fined.
Jimbo: .....
Then the next week Jimbo did the exact same thing, only this time he was in our Camry, in his work clothes (slacks and dress shirt). Mr. S walks right on by and never says a word.
So when he calls today, this is how the conversation goes.
Me: Hello?
Mr. S: I'm calling to speak to Arwen's parents.
Me: This is her Mom.
Mr. S: I have here that you registered Arwen to attend 1st grade here next semester. (note, he doesn't ask he informs)
Me: Yes sir.
Mr. S: We're not accepting anyone from outside the district into the classroom.
Me: Oh, so you're at capacity this year?
Mr. S: No, we're just not accepting anyone outside the district.
Me: I'm confused, I was told that if you weren't at capacity...
Mr. S: It's not personal, nothing against your child but we're not accepting children outside our district, she will have to use your own zone.
Me: I'm not sure if you're aware but the major reason we'd hoped to register her at your school is so she can attend the same school both of her brothers do. My oldest son is a student of Ms. F and has been since last year.
Mr. S: It's not personal but we're not accepting children outside the district. Thank you.
*click*
The fracker hung up on me.
Now. I know school's only have so much room. I knew Arwen might not get into this particular one. But this man talked down to me, treated me like an idiot and then had the audacity to hang up on me. Perhaps the fact that a majority of his parents don't have a college education is his excuse for being so arrogant. Perhaps he is used to intimidating other people because he thinks he is smarter and more cunning. But I'm not one of them and I refuse to be treated so callously by him.
So the next time I go to the school I plan on walking up to him, introducing myself and asking him to explain exactly why my daughter can't attend the school. I'm pretty sure he won't be so ballsy when he's looking me in the face.
I'll save the drama with my Momma (lol drama with my Momma!) for tomorrow. This entry has enough of that as it stands.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Drama amidst Recovery
My neck hurts but not too bad. Medicine is keeping it under control. The doctor says the lump appears to be a tumor that formed on the muscle in my neck but he doesn't think it's serious. It was sent off for pathology and I'll know for certain in 7-10 days.
There is some current drama (good lord) from my Mom. I'll blog more about that when I can think clearly. Suffice to say, it's more of the same from her and it's worn me thin.
Thank you for all the well wishes!! ***HUGS***
Monday, May 19, 2008
It's a Go
Tomorrow I'm having the surgery.
I'm nervous and anxious but hopeful it will be quick and I'll be back in my own bed before noon tomorrow.
Wish me luck, hopefully I'll be back to blogging within a day or so.
Half Way
I'm halfway through the day and it's been difficult to say the least. My poor husband is struggling just to get off the couch and to keep down gatoraid. There is good news though as the kids seem to have recovered and will be well enough to return to school for their last week.
In between running ragged I'm also very nervous about tomorrow. It's strange. It's not just the surgery it's knowing I will finally "know" what the deal is. In one way it could be a huge relief but in another it could be worse than I imagined. I am hopeful but I'm a natural worry wart.
Speaking of busy, it's naptime, so I'm off to put some rambunctious kids to bed so I can work on cleaning up the huge mess from this morning.
House of Sick
Vomiting, diarrhea, nausea, body aches and chills. This is the funk my family is suffering and it's me versus the evil bug.
Will I make my surgery tomorrow? I'll have a better idea this afternoon. Say a small prayer for us. It's going to be one hell of a busy day.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Time Is Running Out
Give this song and band a go, you will NOT be be disappointed. The lyrics are almost as gorgeous as the music.
Let me know what you think.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Don't Feed the Dinosaurs!
I'm dividing the party pictures into two separate entries, mostly because one set is having fun with my daughter, the others are the ones I took for me (will pick one to enter into photo contest this week).
The party! The dinosaurs are on display here until July, they were very popular with the kids.
This fairy gate actually opened and closed, it was so adorable.
Don't feel too bad
So today we took Arwen to a friends birthday party at the local botanical gardens. It was amazing. I immersed myself into the lush grass and blooming flowers. My nose couldn't get enough of the delicious smells and I swore to myself to return again this summer.
As we sat down I began to talk to a Mother I'd met before. She is very kind and cordial but it's very difficult to talk at times. Her daughter died 8 years ago from Neuroblastoma and each time we've spoken she usually talks about her (and her treatment or how she passed). While I don't mind this at all, I do find myself grasping for words. Usually I repeat, "I'm sorry" or "I cannot imagine" several times.
During our conversation today I noticed she had this smudge of food on her forehead. I couldn't decide...do I say something or not? Our conversation at the time was pretty serious and I really felt horrible about interrupting her. So eventually I decided to just ignore the food and let her talk.
When we finished Arwen and I took off to the back of the park. We spent the next hour by ourselves and after a time I noticed we were literally all alone. I told Arwen we had to go (it was getting late anyway) and it's a good thing. The park had been closed 30 minutes by the time we walked out. Whoops.
As we got into the car and I buckled Arwen in I looked at myself in the rear view mirror. I went to apply my chapstick when I noticed something green stuck between my front teeth. It was a sliver of spice from the pepperoni pizza I had at the party.
That's what they call karma baby.
COPS
As we were pulling out of Payless shoes Arwen noticed the police car.
Arwen: "Mommy, there is a police man!"
Me: "Yup."
Arwen: "Hey, the policeman can arrest bad people right?"
Me: "Yup."
Arwen: "Hey, you know the policeman song right?"
Me: "Uhh, song?"
Arwen: "Yeah, the policeman song."
Me: "Uhh, no..."
Arwen: "Yeah you do, it's this one: 'What you gonna do, what you gonna do when they come for you. Bad boys, bad boys! What you gonna do when they come for you."
Me: "Where did you learn that?"
Arwen: "It's saw it on the TV at Mimi's house. You know, the show COPS."
Well that explains her fascination.
Well Excuuuuse Me!
I needed my nail brush from the bathroom. I walked up the stairs and to the door.
"I'm in here!" Jimbo bellowed from the other side.
"Oh, can you please hand me my nail brush?"
"Can't you wait?" he yells back. I hear the rustling of a magazine which means he's enjoying leisurely bathroom time.
"Not really," I say back. "You could be in there a while." I know from experience his leisurely bathroom breaks last as long as whatever he is reading does.
"Damn it, can't someone take a shit in peace?" he starts yelling. I hear him rustle the magazine again.
"Look, I won't look for god's sake, just hand..."
The door opens and he throws it out the door and slams it back into place. The brush skids across the floor to rest at my feet.
"Thanks babe," I bend down to pick it up. "I'm so glad I didn't marry an asshole."
"I'm not being an asshole, there is nothing worse than pinching out a load and being interrupted!"
Excuse the hell out of me. It's not like I would know ANYTHING about visiting the bathroom in private. You know, since I've had an expanding viewing audience since 2002.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Mapping it Out
I'm stressed and for the first time it's not revolving around my health. Instead the focus of my worries is the upcoming summer with all of my children.
Saying it's hard to be the lone adult versus 4 rambunctious children is a understatement. It's like a rotating spin wheel and each of them take turns deciding my fate.
"I need a drink."
"I need to potty."
"I'm hungry."
And then there is the normal sibling bickering.
"Vincent pushed me!"
"Logan took my toy!"
"Arwen won't share!"
I've decided to sit down and create a firm schedule for them. The one thing I've learned with children is a set schedule keeps things smooth. Children need a routine, it calms them and helps them feel in control. I've been thinking also of different activities, including trips to the park maybe 1-2 times per week (with rising gas costs we cannot afford more of them). Maybe we can finally get a swing set for them this year as well.
I hope I survive.
Into the Wild
I heard about this book and subsequently this movie by chance. I was researching Twilight's new movie when I heard Kristin Stewart played a part in the movie so I went looking. I was immediately transfixed by the story and went to the video store to pick it up (this was the movie I spoke about yesterday).
Last night we watched it (I'm purchasing the book this weekend) and it was truly lovely. Emile Hirsch became Christopher McCandless and it was amazing to watch. The movie was long (3 hours) but the time just flew by and I never found myself looking even once at the clock to see how much longer the film had.
If you get the chance, give this movie a go. But a warning, don't read too much about it online or you'll know everything about the movie. I didn't tell Jimbo the premise (I knew from researching it online) and he was really struck with the movie. I wish I could have seen it from that perspective.
I'll let you know about the book after I've read it.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Mortified
He was great at Wal-Mart so I expected no different at the video store. We walked inside and he ran to the gumball machine. I watched him from the corner of my eye and told him we'd get one before we left.
Then he began throwing his tantrum.
His screams echoed throughout the store. I tried ignoring them at first, hopeful he would just follow me as I continued walking but instead he threw himself into the floor in a full out fit. I walked back to him and told him to stop, it did no good. So I put Annabel's car seat (with her snugly inside) on the ground to grab his arms and get on face level.
"Stop right now." I said in a firm voice. My temper was starting to rise as did my embarrassment.
When this didn't work I grabbed him by the hand to lead him to the video I wanted. I knew exactly where it was and all I had to do was to grab it and go. This wasn't to happen however as he immediately threw himself to the ground, his body dead weight. I struggled to pull him and carry Annabel before finally reaching the other side of the store. I felt eyes bore through me and tried to keep my cool.
Suddenly Vincent spotted a Thomas video and immediately stopped. He stood and rushed over and was back to the sweet loving boy I know. We quickly made my selections and hurried to the front. Vincent was pleasant as I paid and I placed Annabel just over the line with DVD's in her seat to quickly buy a gumball for her brother.
A orange one came out and this led to another fit as he wanted the white one. He began to scream and tantrum yet again. I regretted my decision to be nice and watched as he threw himself into the floor and began his thrashing, kicking so hard he lost his shoe. I grabbed the shoe and tried to place it onto his foot after this I pulled him around to Annabel to try to leave. This is when he played his little dead weight trick on me again.
As this occurred an older man was walking out of the store. He stopped to watch the show and I felt like asking him if he would like some popcorn. I was mortified, embarrassed and fed up so I did what I should have done in the first place.
I spanked his little hiney.
He continued to cry but he followed me as asked out to the van. I told him when we got home it was straight to bed for nap. And that is exactly what happened.
From here on out, when he tantrums like this, I'm not requesting he stop. I'm demanding it. I refuse to have my child behave like that.
What they wouldn't Give
The letter I was to write is no more. Samuel has decided he doesn't want to see his Father after all. He's come to realize this man has left him through out his entire life and it would serve no purpose to speak with him. He says the only thing he's thankful for when it comes to his Father is, "that he gave me life".
I struggle to understand this man. I can't contemplate how a person wouldn't want to at least speak to their own flesh and blood. After all, he was a part of his life when he was smaller. But after Jo died he just stopped coming around. The only reminder of his existence being the monthly child support checks that he was chased down for and forced to pay each month via automatic withdraw.
There are people who would give anything to have the opportunity to speak just once with their child. There are others who would sacrifice their soul for one last day with their son or daughter. Yet here is this man who is totally unmoved by the needs of his son and can't even take the time to make a simple phone call.
