Superbowl

For the first time in my life I didn't have a team to root for this year. This isn't because I dislike the Giants nor the Patriots but instead stems from the fact I cannot stand either quarterback: Eli Manning or Tom Brady.

I couldn't decide who I wanted to lose more so I cheered on whenever any sack was made and booed all touchdown passes. I cheered for both teams and against both teams and at the end when the Giants won I felt strangely let down and furious.

It is without a doubt the worst Superbowl of my life. I hope next year marks a return to enjoying this yearly celebration. Just god please no more Eli or Tom. Especially Eli. Anyone remember the hissy fit he threw when he was drafted by the Chargers? He made my children look good. What a pansy.

Sarah Silverman

This is one of the most funny things I've seen all week. If you watch Jimmy Kimmel like I do you know all about the 'war' between these too.

Warning, tons of bleeping going on, so no children in the room when watching!

Another sick news story

I've been loosely following THIS story. It is just too much for me at times to even think about. I hope the baby didn't suffer but I'm sure she did. Being cooked in a microwave and dying hours later cannot be pleasant.

This is the reason I stay at home. This is why I've never had anyone babysit that wasn't my own Mother, Sister, or Mother in law (or Aunt on a few occassions). I fear too much for my children. The world isn't the place it used to be. You cannot even trust Mothers with their own children anymore.

I hope this woman burns. I think we are too lax on people that commit crimes such as these. Things like this occur too often, to too many children. Now don't misunderstand me. I realize that in some circumstances women are mentally ill. For them I feel sorrow but I can't impart total blame. If you've ever read Are you Home Alone about Andrea Yates you'll see what I mean. Sometimes people don't heed the warning signs and in those situations I blame the support system *cough*her husband*cough.

The more I see things like this the more I really am considering adoption in the future. I know my children drive me batty from time to time but they also fill me with more gratification than any well paying job ever could. Just knowing I could take a child from a potentially dangerous environment, show him or her endless love and devotion. That I could become a Mother to a child that desperately needs it. How can I not consider taking that step?

In the meantime, there are more children than my loving arms could ever take in and that breaks my heart. Children are so innocent, how can a person harm one. I just don't understand and I'm glad I don't.

(note, the picture above was taken from HERE. The image really touched me. It is Children adopted with mental illness caused by the time they spent in the orphanageYedioth Achronot 2006)

Shape of a Mother

Every woman, should visit this site. I know it caterers to Mothers but I feel it goes a long way in helping all women feel secure and beautiful in their own skin.

I've been tempted to post some pictures of my own but I'm still debating it. Anyhow, check it out, and be cautious, there is some nudity (tasteful but still nudity, I looked again, some of the nudity is very raw but I don't find it offensive but that is just ME so please, proceed with caution).

The Shape of a Mother.

*edited the link, thanks Rae ;)

Respect

I've went from angry to down right pissed at entertainment reporters. I read THIS on CNN.com.

Heath Ledger was an intensely private man. You could tell this just by watching the interviews he gave. I know he tried to live his life out of the spot light. He resided in Brooklyn which goes to show his desire to be normal and to blend in with his neighbors and those around him.

I suppose that's what makes me so upset. In his death he should be respected as much as possible. I realize people want to publish stories. I don't mind that at all. People magazine ran a cover story about him and it was tastefully done. But Entertainment Tonight isn't following that same protocol.

They've come across a video tape that is 2 years old that shows Heath in a room with people doing drugs. I've not seen the video in it's entirety but I've seen the clips of him (it was on a commercial for the show) saying he has a daughter (he says her name) and his girlfriend is going to be so pissed at him. Entertainment Tonight was going to air this video in it's entirety for the world to see. It was set to be viewed tonight.

Then today they decided to pull the plug. I actually thought there was hope. Maybe they could see past the dollar signs and instead allow his family to mourn. But no. They have decided not to go forward because they fear the backlash from agents who have written producers to state they will not allow their star clients to appear on the show if ET proceeds forward with it's report.

How freaking sad.

Burn Out

I've known for a few months now this was coming. I'd felt the beginning signs during the last months of my pregnancy with Annabel. I don't know any other stay at home Mothers (or at least any that live nearby that I visit with) but I'm sure that I'm not alone.

I'm talking about the SAHM (stay at home Mom) burn out. Basically this means I'm in a funk. I tired of cleaning, I'm tired of laundry, I'm tired of zero sleep. I'm tired of garbage, I'm tired of toys, I'm tired of eating last every night. I'm tired of Dora, I'm tired of Hot Wheels, I'm tired of barbie. I'm sick of dirty diapers, I'm sick of being overwhelmed, I'm sick of being home alone each and every day.

I realize this is a phase and I will get over it. I also realize there are options (such as playgroups) but I think those would stress me more than benefit. I'm not your average girly girl and the last time I attempted to immerse myself into a Mommy group I didn't like the high school mentality. I gave up gossip and hurting other people to boost my own ego long ago.

So what's a Mom to do? I don't know for sure. There are some days when I feel I might be losing 'me'. You know, that person I was before I became a Mother. I know she is under the surface somewhere but lying dormant, waiting for her moment to come to the top to breathe again.

I'm also attempting to cut myself a bit of slack. After all, I've been in this same house, caring for multiple children, for over 6 years now. That's right. 6 long years of caring for children day in and day out with nary an adult in sight.

I just hope at this point when I'm integrated back into society I retain some of my social skills. I've already noticed I have my own kiddy language. NiNi=Night Night, Poopy da Potty=Go to the toilet, Nummies=Food, Give me a Moo=Kisses. You get my drift.

Mom Confession of the Week

I want a vacation. A long, peaceful, and most of all QUIET vacation.