Victoria Beckham

No wonder girls have serious healthy body issues. This is what they aspire to be.
Victoria, you look terrible, go eat something, NOW. Stop reading.

Go.Eat.Food.Now.Please.

Nine Inch Nails - Something I can never Have

And now, for the one true love of my heart when it comes to music. True most of the tracks are not soft and eloquent but the beauty is in the lyrics.

I remember the first time I was introduced to Mr. Trent Reznor. It was the popular song "Closer" which is nothing like "Something I can Never Have". Still, I love this band and this music.

Here are the lyrics:

I still recall the taste of your tears.
Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears.
My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore.
Scraping through my head till I dont want to sleep anymore.

You Make this all go away.
You make this all go away.
Im down to just one thing.
Im starting to scare myself.
You Make this all go away.
You make it all go way.
I just want something.
I just want something I can never have.

You always were the one to show me how.
Back then I couldnt do the things that I can do now.
This thing is slowly taking me apart.
Grey would be the color if I had a heart.

You make this all go away.
You make this all go away.
I'm down to just one thing
I'm starting to scare myself.
You make this all go away.
You make it all go away.
I just want something.
I just want something, I can never have.

In this place it seems like such a shame.
Though it all looks different now,
I know its still the same
Everywhere I look youre all I see.
Just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be.

Come on tell me.
You Make this all go away.
You make this all go away.
Im down to just one thing.
And Im starting to scare myself.
You Make this all go away.
You make it all go way.

I just want something, I just want something I can never have.

I just want something, I just want something I can never have.

The Beatles - Hey Jude

Spook did a entry about music/bands that move you.

This is one of those for me. The Beatles. I don't think any furthur explanation is necessary.

Twitch

What to do, what to do. I've received a few nuggets of advice on dealing with this monster. I blogged about him the other day in my Warning, Huge Rant Ahead entry.

*****

This dog has:

Tried to knock up our local Shetland Sheepdog breeders female when she was in heat. He had dug a nice hole around their fence when spotted and the breeder tied him next to the road with a sign that said, "Keep Your Dog Up!!!"

Ruined my new flowerbeds and garden. He dug up all the new plants or pee'd on them, thus making them die. Then he moved on to taking massive doggie dumps all over the place. I spent a week catching him in the act and screaming and yelling at him but he would just do it when I was inside with my children.

Knocks over our trash cans and digs out dirty diapers, etc. It's disgusting and I have to clean it. Once I had to do so when his owners pulled in and saw me. Yeah, thanks alot assholes.

*****

Now, I asked a few people on MUA what to do about this. The response was mostly positive but I was somewhat shocked at a few of the suggestions, ones like this:

"Get a garden fence and put it up, it will keep him out and won't hurt the doggie!"

"Get one of those little sensor alarms, it sets off a smell when they enter and it won't hurt the dog but it will save your garden."

"Try the spray that stinks to them, that will keep him out."

.

There were a few of them that all agreed it wasn't the "poor dogs fault" and I shouldn't harm him or make him suffer for his owners ignorance. Yet when I mentioned taking dear old bag of fur to the shelter I got, "don't do that! he might be put to sleep or worse!"

.

Yeah, ok, I'll just continue to suffer the next 10 years or so until the dog bites the dust.

.

Please explain this to me. Why would I spend all kinds of money on a dog that does not belong to me? Does this strike anyone else as a bit, well how do I say this...stupid? I'm not an animal hater by any means but I don't have money to blow on Twitch. I looked into those options above and the cheapest method was damn near $50!

I.Think.Not.

Other than snatching him up one day when he is in my yard and taking him to the local shelter, I'm at a loss. I don't wish the dog harm but I want my yard back. I'm tired of it looking all nasty except for where the grass is cut.

Shouldn't I be entitled to a nice lawn and garden? I mean it is our home and property after all. We have a dog but he is kept in a nice large fenced in backyard, it's called responsible pet ownership. And his owners are well aware of the discord. They either don't care or can't understand, "Keep your dog up or next time you won't be able to just pick him up." (words from the kick ass dog breeder, you go boy!) This dog literally roams where he wants, they know it, they don't care.

I'd love to hear what others think about this. You should also know that we have no animal control in the county and there is no leash law. Those less kind than myself (aka my Grandmother and older relatives) would just use poison or a shotgun to be rid of him. That's what they did in their day.

Where have all the Unicorns gone?

I'm a child of the 80's, I admit that with pride. Back then Unicorns were the shiznit. Everyone loved them and wanted them. You could find them plastered on shirts, airbrushed on blue jean jackets and given as prizes on glass mirrors at the local fair.

So naturally, I was thrilled when Arwen started becoming interested in them (and horses, naturally). She told me the magic words, "I want a Unicorn birthday Party," and it took all I had not to pump my arm in the air Arsenio Hall style. I was so excited. It almost made the skating party with 25 wild children something bearable.

Then I started looking...and looking...and looking. I became frantic. Aside from a huge Mylar balloon I could find nothing. No napkins, cups, or plates. No party favors, cake toppers, or hats. I couldn't even find a decent cake. I called stores, sent my Mom, still no go.

I rushed to the Internet and finally found what I sought only to cringe at the huge inflated shipping costs. I debated on just purchasing purple or pink and telling Arwen I was sorry but I couldn't find what she wanted. But ultimately I know it's her birthday and what she truly wants so I will sacrifice to see that she gets it (even if that means the haircut I've been needing will be pushed back another few weeks).

Where oh where have all the unicorns gone? I hope locating a collectible Unicorn won't be as difficult. I know that the shop I used to frequent is still open. Hopefully I can find something that will take her breath (ok maybe mine too) away.

Mom Confession of the Week

I feel like a dairy cow. Just call me Moo-Me.

Beware, Huge Rant Ahead!

I have a few things to get off my chest:

Why does the computer run so damned slow when I need to look something up? I thought DSL was more expensive because it performed better.

Why do my children fight one another? Why can't they get along for more than 15 minutes at a time?

.

Why do they insist upon dragging out each toy to make a huge mess. What happened to one toy at a time to play with happily?

.

Why do my children leave all the shitty diapers for me? And better still, why does my 4 year old only use the potty when his Daddy is home.

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Why do I have to put all these periods .... in between my paragraphs blogger??? I put a space in the preview but it never shows up. This is a serious peeve.

And as for...

You people who made hot wheels cars. Each time I step on one of those fuckers I wish you would die a slow painful death.

To the people who decide to purchase cheap ass toys to give for christmas/birthday/holiday gifts. Do me a favor and just don't. You try explaining to my children why the toy they got only worked for 5 minutes and is "all gone" now.

To the people building a house next to us. Having your contractors show at 6am to pound away has made me hate you.

To my neighbors dog, Twitch. You've killed all my plants, ruined my yard and shit in my driveway. Your time is coming to an end my friend.

To my Mom. I love you, dearly. But don't keep buying stuff for ages 5-7 for my boys ages 2-4. They just don't get it and you only cause me to have to store more worthless crap they can, "grow into". I have an idea...it's called a giftcard.

.

Annabel. I love you more than life, I do. But I can't hold you all the time. Your screaming won't get you that end result.

And finally:

To the Oriental Trading Co. Fuck You. I'm not spending $17 dollars to ship $30 dollars for Unicorn stuff for my daughter. That is insane. I'll spend today looking for cheaper alternatives. You should be ashamed taking advantage of childrens birthdays as a way to make a buck.

**sorry for the rant. I'm not feeling well and it's Jimbos first day back at work. I apologize for my mouth as well but there are just those days when you need to let out a good "fuck" now and again.