Time is a funny thing. It is either something you love or something you hate. At the moment I don't like time much.
The trip to see the OB specialists is on March 5th, a full week away. After that day finally arrives I will have to wait an additional 7-9 days to get the results of my amnio. A large part of me wants to shout at these people "do you not realize that we are on a tight schedule here?? I'm almost 5 months preggo people!!" But there is no one to scream or rant at, only a letter in the mail requesting information. I'm actually going to make a call today to make sure the amnio will be set for me on that day.
My one aggrivation is my OB and his staff. They are the most uncaring and unsympathetic people imaginable. Everytime I call to find out a test result or to ask a question I can tell it annoys them. It's really sad when you don't want to call the one person that can give you answers since you're treated like an inconvience. I think I'll be finding another OB after this.
Another suck ass thing is my migraines have gotten worse and they are totally stress related. Anytime I get stressed out I get them and boy I've hit the motherload. There isn't much I can take but I do have some pain meds I take when it's unbearable, which is pretty often since the "news".
Jim and I are having a really hard time deciding what to do. We realize that we have to think of our children and how the choices made will impact them. I'm just fortunate that I still realize something isn't right and the baby still hasn't kicked. It's easier to make an informed decision when you can step back and think things clearly and logically. I don't want to distance myself from any of the reality of what is occuring but I do want to make my decisions based on the harsh truths that we're facing.
I'm going to get a shower and do some cleaning and watch the clock tic by one second at a time in between.
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